Hell Comes to Frogtown (1988)

A new breed of enemy has taken over the world… Sam Hell has come to take it back!
Director: Donald G. Jackson & R.J. Kizer
Writer: Randall Frakes
Cast: Roddy Piper, Sandhal Bergman, Cec Verrell, Rory Calhoun, Nicolas Worth, Brian Frank & William Smith.
Studio: Anchor Bay
Special Features: Commentary & TrailerA film is a combination of story and execution – its story should be worth telling and its telling should be done competently. While these two elements usually need to be “good” for a film to be “good,” sometimes when one area is especially inspired, people will overlook shortcomings in the other. Hatchet‘s over-the-top execution elevated its same old slasher premise while Saw broke the mold with its story despite its shabby execution. Hell Comes to Frogtown isn’t well-executed on really any level – its budget also holds it back from what it could’ve been – but it’s ridiculous story still offers some entertainment.In a post-apocalyptic wasteland where nuclear war has decimated the world’s population, people are scarce – fertile people are scarcer. Med-Tech is a division of the government with the specific focus on re-populating the country, and they’ve just found a man with the highest sperm count they’ve ever seen: Sam Hell (Piper). But fallout from the nuclear war has also created a race of mutant frogs. And despite the government having successfully herded them onto reservations, Commander Toty (Frank) has managed to capture several fertile women for his harem. Now forced into a contract with the US government in exchange for immunity from past transgression, Hell, who’s accompanied by Med-Tech’s Spangle (Bergman) and Centinella (Verrell), must infiltrate Frogtown and free the captive women so he may eventually impregnate them.

Hell Comes to Frogtown is the type of film that shouldn’t need a review. Now, I’ll gladly admit I’m the type of guy that could watch Randy Piper spread his seed one woman at a time – can you imagine the glorious, golden-haired, musclebound, wildly overacting progeny he’d make? – but not everyone is cut from this cloth (how I pity you all). The way I see it, though – you’re either frothing at the mouth to see the film by the time you finish the above synopsis or you’re not. It’s that simple, because this is the element the film has going for it: its story. I will concede that it’s a completely absurd one, but to a segment of the population, which I’m proudly a part of, it’s this kind of absurdity that’s a hell of a lot of fun to watch. Other films may focus on the struggles of re-populating the world following an apocalyptic event, but no film is as wild in its approach to that idea as Hell Comes to Frogtown.

And that’s why despite the film’s stumbles in execution – its script is seriously flawed – it skates by on its ludicrous premise and B-movie qualities. It’s buoyed by frequent tits and ass, which the director points out in the commentary, but I’m not sure when that’s ever been a problem? Sandhal Bergman, who you should recognize as Valeria in Conan the Barbarian, is simply gorgeous (her glasses are not however) while the equally exquisite Cec Verrell strips down to experience Sam’s legendary reputation. It’s all done a little awkwardly yet it’s shamelessly entertaining. The dialogue also proves to be awkward in certain scenes like when Spangle says, “Stop. Save yourself for the fertiles,” and Sam replies, “I have enough.” While that sounds like a benign statement, you eventually understand he’s talking about his spunk – a creepy realization to be sure. But the film actually stretches its budget a surprisingly long ways with descent prosthetic effects, though they show their age in 2011, and an old refinery appropriately serving as the dark and dangerous Frogtown.